Nobler in the Mind

Thursday, April 20, 2006

A Delicate Ecosystem

The spiders have reclaimed the bathroom in my absence. I swear, take off for a few days and they get cocky; think they own the place. But as I reach for Sting (my rolled-up copy of The Economist), I’m faced with an unexpected dilemma: It seems that the spider population is inversely proportional to the cockroach population, which appears to have been reduced to a few carcasses that any homicide detective worth his salt can determine are no work of my own (flat is more my style). Are the spiders hunting the cockroaches? Should I call a temporary truce with my sworn enemy to eradicate this new menace? Cockroaches are more unsanitary, but spiders are . . . just so damned ugly!

Devout Buddhist that I am, I take no pleasure in killing living things. But I’m sorry folks; four legs is where I draw the line. If you’ve got more than four legs you’d better have something else to make up for it, like pretty wings or something. Otherwise, yous gonna hafta get whacked. Even if you do happen to be performing an important ecological function. As far as having a preference between spiders and cockroaches. . . . I believe it was Herman Hesse who once said: “Kill ‘em all and let God sort 'em out.”


At 11:56 PM, Blogger jon said...

Nooooo! I know this blog is 2 years old but STOP KILLING SPIDERS! Which do you prefer, spiders or flies and mosqitos? I know I could use all the help I can get against those b'tards. And anyway, they're cute. Oh c.mon - they're like little men, same as ants! And they work hard. Every day for a fortnight a little spider had wove itself a new web between my bike's wingmirror and handlebar only for me to bust it up. Never complained, not once. I urge you to reconsider your stance - just watch it build a web, you'll be amazed -trust me.


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